Life Lessons Learned in Accounting? Alliterations??

This afternoon I was sitting in my managerial accounting class mult-tasking. I was trying to look intrigued while fighting the urge to nod off like the rest of my sleepy classmates. I don't care how boring the class is, it always upsets me to see people sitting towards the front of the class who stare at the professor open mouthed and roll their head to the side unashamedly and non discretely to check the clock on the wall every couple of minutes. Today there was a woman in her mid to late 30's doing just that. I couldn't help but think to myself, "Come on, really? If you're going to school this late in the game you have way more reason to look interested in what he's saying than the rest of us."

Towards the end of class my professor noticed her roll her lazy head to look at the clock again while letting out a sigh. He began to address her and I thought, boy is she going to get it, this will teach her to look interested. Instead, what happened was a shock to me, and a wake up call to the rest of the class. He asked, "Your father passed away a few days ago didn't he. How are you doing? Are you ok?"

All of my pointing fingers curled into a fist that beat mercilessly on my conscience. She replied that she was doing alright, and he said, "My dad died yesterday."

I gained a great amount of respect for both of them. It must be hard to get up and go to school and try and stay focused with the weight of your loss on your shoulders. It was all she could do to get through another class. And what courage my professor had, to stay and teach a class that few were actually listening to when he could have cancelled to mourn his loss. He must have thought it was important for us that he was there.

It just goes to show that you never know the reasons behind why anyone does anything. Some people may be rude, or treat others badly because they are suffering and don't realize that their behavior is unacceptable. In hard times our minds often move a million miles an hour on auto-pilot and we do things we wouldn't normally do, and say things we wouldn't normally say. We can be so focused on the past or the future that the slippery minutes we grasp at presently, pass into history without a second thought of civility or decorum.

How quick we are to pass judgement and make assumptions. I need not repeat the familiar adage of assumptions and what becomes of us when we assume.

I do still believe that there is no rhyme or reason behind drivers of big trucks. The consistent behavior of trucks on the road has led me to believe that perhaps the reason they drive the way they do is in fact because of the truck. Perhaps it is uncomfortable, or perhaps it doesn't get the gas mileage that they were promised from television ads and checkered suited salespeople. Or perhaps the trucks need an exorcism.

To be, or to be crazy?

So I don't know if any of y'all are following this Charlie Sheen business. He be straight up crazy. Is he pulling a Joaquin Phoenix, or is he just delusional from "banging 7 gram rocks" and living a "@$^@&@$ rockstar lifestyle"? Let's look at the facts:

1) Most Paid Television Actor this year for performance in Two and a Half Men. First of all, who watches that show? I don't even know what it's about. I guess always kind of assumed that it was either about two gay guys who adopted a kid, or three elderly men suffering from diabetes. Apparently this show has been around for eight years, and people are still wondering does anyone watch this show?? and if no one is watching, why are they still making new episodes? (at least until recently)

2) Has not been in a significant leading movie role since 1989, and at that, those movies were forgettable. His best performance was a two minute segment at the end of Ferris Bueller.

3) Son of "famous?" actor Martin Sheen. Growing up watching his daddy living that life so he got plenty of ideas there I suppose.

Let's analyze the facts here than. He is either:
a) just "living the dream" of his undeserved fortune and withdrawals from severe cocaine addiction
b) trying to get some attention because his career is at an all time low
or
c) mentally unstable.

Now let's take a look at some of our favorite Sheen quotes, tweets, and oddities straight from the Sheenius himself. These nuggets are pure gold. Or just nuggets. But, in the words of LeVar Burton, "don't take my word for it."
(special thanks to http://charlieswinning.com/quotes/ for the quotes)

“I am on a drug – it’s called Charlie Sheen. It’s not available because if you try it, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.” Wow. Can I Just say that he paints such a detailed visual, I can see exactly the level of morbidity (spell checker says I'm ok with that one) and delusionalism (spell checker says I'm not on that one) in his head.

“I’m different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man.” Right on the money. If you have tiger's blood in you you're not just different, you are a miracle. You also might have tiger aids.

“If you borrowed my brain for five seconds, you’d be like, ‘Dude! Can’t handle it, unplug this bastard!’ It fires in a way that’s maybe not from, uh… this terrestrial realm.”

“The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards, all of them look like droopy-eyed, armless children.” Sure, if you're on drugs you could meet famous stars and see people as though they had no arms. everyone has a bad trip sometimes and has to hang out with Jagger. Look at Randy Jackson.

“I probably took more than anybody could survive. I was banging seven-gram rocks. Because that’s how I roll. I have one speed. I have one gear: Go.”

“I’m not bi-polar, I’m bi-winning.” What does that even mean? bi-winning? You win, and yet, you win? A win-win situation? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

“It’s been a tsunami of media and I’ve been riding it on a mercury surfboard.” The tiger's blood must be immune to mercury. Or maybe his drug experimentation has gone too far.

“The only thing I’m addicted to right now is winning.” Give up on the lotto man, let it go.

“Dying is for fools, amateurs.”

“I wish him nothing but pain in his silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon. Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words — imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.” Fire breathing - ok, you know what, no. I'll just take your word for it.

“If you’re a part of my family, I will love you violently.” That's gotten you in trouble with the coppers before. I don't think I would ever describe love as violent dude. That will only land you in the slammer. Again.

“I’ve got a 10,000 year old brain and the boogers of a 7 year old.” Pure genius. Couldn't have said it any better.

“I am battle tested bayonets” wait, what?

“Resentments are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber.”Now I'm lost for real.

"Rumors? fact? while feet drag, the warlock levitates. Away from fools gold, or towards the actual mine." So is it a rumor or a fact about the levitating warlock? Or is it a rumor or fact that someone's feet are dragging? Or is the warlock not levitating high enough because his feet are dragging on the ground? Or is the warlock a metaphor for Charlie who is levitating high as a kite? or...

"I'm dealing with fools and trolls, I don't have time for these clowns!" Who does have time for clowns when you've got trolls to deal with? Remember Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets? When there was a Troll loose in Hogwarts you didn't see him sitting in at the circus popping peanuts into his mouth and laughing casually at Bozo's antics. Oh no, he dealt with that troll even to the point of being covered in bogey. And what about Frodo and the Fellowship trapped in the Mines of Moria? You didn't hear them say, "Hey, why don't we go catch Barnum and Bailey's tonight? I can't handle these trolls." Negative, you did not. Charlie, maybe we've got you all wrong dude. Maybe we're not seeing things straight.

We're definitely not seeing this "straight". Poor Jimmy Kimmel didn't even see it coming.

Is it any coincidence that after all this insanity he is doing live shows across the country? What will he do, I wonder, at his live shows. Stand up? He definitely is funny, however not because of his "wit". Maybe he'll "bang seven gram rocks" and let people witness the dangerous spectacle. Maybe he'll just trash the set. Maybe he'll perform magic tricks he learned from the warlock. Whatever he does, I'm sure he'll win.

Betta Fish, Snail, and Frogs

Eh, Steve? sulked about his little aquariumcito until I finally dumped him into the goldfish bowl when the goldfishes died. In his place we put two dwarf african frogs, and a sea snail. I named one of the frogs Kermit, and I don't remember the other ones name. He's a poop though, doesn't do much. The snails name is Gary Frick. Turns out the snail is one of the coolest pets i've ever owned. He doesn't do a whole lot, but he does look super creepy, and glides around the bottom of the aquariumcito and up and down the sides all day. The frogs are mean, they always wait until the snail sticks his antennae out with his eye balls and then they jam their noses into his eyes until he hides them back under his shell. So that's what's going on now with the pets.
i got another gnome recently, his name is Rufus. I'll put up a picture of him eventually. I'm so behind!
Hmm...what else is new...Just plugging away at school and super busy with two jobs. Next week I'm working 26 hours at one job and 10 at the other. Plus I have a test or two.
Scott, Jon, and myself went and shot out the glass of an old TV that Hannah asked me to take out of my office ever since we moved into this apartment. That was fun. I took the first shot and a piece of glass hit me in the face. I guess we weren't standing far enough away. That was a bit unnerving. After we shot out all the glass we pushed it down a hill and shot at it as it rolled. That was fun.
I can't really think of anything else to say right now. I'm eating and I'm really hungry, so I'll just concentrate on that for now. Cheerio.

Enough is Enough already.

"Jimmer" is not an adjective. It is not an adverb. It is not a noun. It is not an interjection. It is not an onomatopoeia. It is not a verb that can be conjugated in the present, present perfect, preterit, etc. I don't believe it even qualifies as a personal pronoun, or obscenity. In the same way that you can't "smurf" something, or be "smurfed", or eat "smurfingly", nothing can be done with the so-called word "Jimmer" and leave you with a shred of dignity or smug benevolence. Enough is enough.

Got the job!

These past few months have been pretty hard. Hannah and I have had a lot of hopes and a lot of let downs. I applied for several HR internships only to be let down time and time again. We found the perfect summer job opportunity where we could both work at a resort in southern Utah and thought for sure we were going to get it along with some of our friends who were very qualified for the job. We were crushed when that plan fell through, but excited to try an even better job at a resort by Bear Lake where the manager was very excited about giving us the opportunity to work. We were let down again by bad news that we didn't have the right equipment to fulfill the position. Then, I was invited to an interview by a guy who said my resume was the best he'd seen and was excited to interview me if I could begin working full time in mid march. Again we were let down wondering if we would find anything at all. I interviewed with a very solid internship that never contacted me back, despite my attempt at contacting them for a follow up.

We kept praying and waiting patiently for an opportunity to come along, and then it did. Last year we went to Disneyland for spring break and had a great time. This year we didn't make any plans, and I worked a lot at Best Buy. Hannah frequently checked the job board at school for any signs of an internship or a job for the summer. On Wednesday she found a job appear in the HR department of USU. She excitedly told me about, and I called right away to schedule an appointment. I was told that only five applicants would be considered and that I should email my resume ASAP. I did so, and an interview was set up for Thursday morning. At the interview I was told that of the three applicants, I was the only one who A) followed instructions, and B) actually met the qualifications for the job. We had a great conversation and I felt very good about the interview. I was told that the job needed to be fulfilled very soon and that I would find out within a few days the final decision. Today I was extended an offer for the job.

The job is pretty simple, for now. The title is Office Assistant, and my big project for now is to file the ongoing stacks of immense paperwork that flow through the office daily. I'll also be tackling the daunting task of archiving documents from 1997-2005. There will be various tasks and projects that I will be assigned as they arise. Yeah, doesn't sound like a great job, right? Wrong! I was told there are plenty of opportunities to progress and move on to more meaningful positions. This is much better than an internship. We don't have to relocate, and I can work in an HR office throughout the rest of my college career. How good would it look on a resume to say I've got a few years of experience in an HR department? How great is it to be familiar with the paperwork that validates the existence of my chosen profession? An internship goes for maybe four months, and how will your employer know exactly what you've done? We are so thankful for this opportunity. Our prayers and fasts have been answered, and we are full of gratitude.